The Boat of Advanced Living
A chronicle of life after a career while embarking on the next cycle in life.
Friday, February 17, 2017
Monday, April 28, 2014
Rollercoaster of feelings.
My Mothe r, who is almost 90, has to move out of her home after 42 years. She has lived in the same spot for over 60 years. She has lived in the same neighborhood for that long as well. She doesn't want to move, and I'm here helping her get ready to do so. Today was not a good day. She was trying to help me wrap up some things for the boxes. She did okay but I think the memories and the reality of the move overcame her. When my mom gets anxious, she also gets irritable. She has her own system of doing things and at this point she has to rely on me and it is not fun. She gets depressed and she just says things like "I don't want to move and I just want to go on a nursing home." Once the move is over, I think she's going to be ok. But until then it isn't going to be easy. I have a very similar personality to my mothers. Things between us can become tense at times ,and it is hard for me to remember that she is under this kind of stress and what it must feel like. I'm grateful for being able to be with her, and to help her with this. I just want everything to be smooth and comfortable for her. I think this is just an awesome thing to go through and I am just praying that we're going to be able to overcome this and look back with gratitude in a year or two and be grateful for where we will be. For those of you whose mother has passed on, I know you would tell me to be grateful for the time I have with her and to overlook a lot of things. Believe me I think about that every day. I try to remind myself when she talks too much, or she is too difficult, or she is being very demanding, that one day I may not have her in my life ? I bite my tongue as much as I can. Not always easy to do.
I know this situation will be over in a short while.
Sunday, March 30, 2014
Hot Air! I am under it this time!
I made the decision right then and there that I wanted to do it and put my name on the list for a ride. It looked like there might be an afternoon spot available, and so as I watched the morning launch I started to get excited. I got the call confirming my spot and showed up amidst all the balloon captains and crews laying out and preparing the balloons to go. I met a great crew of people and along with my friends to see me off went up in the Blue Flame with David Harwell. David has been piloting balloons for rover thirty years, and he has owned seven different balloons. The Blue Flame is a splendid large balloon that fits three in the basket.
Once the balloon was inflated, it took almost no time for us to be ascending and leaving my friends shrinking on the ground. I was really amazed at how calm I was, but also a bit alarmed to realize how little control there is for these balloons.
You are truly subject to the wind and you have to go in that direction. No control. David explained to my fellow balloonist JoAnn Dotson and I that this was a fairly safe trip with the exception of the danger of landing in electric wires. He would periodically reach up and pull the lever to shoot the flame from the gas burner into the balloon, heating the air and controlling our altitude.
Other than the loud sound of the fire, like a super torch for ten or fifteen seconds it was total silence. Amazing.
Looking at the other balloons ahead and behind us was like being in a dream. It reminded me of jellyfish floating in the water at different levels, but still going with the current. Seeing my hometown from above was very disorienting, but when I recognized a landmark it gave me a whole new way of thinking and seeing things. There were a lot of forests and fields around the town and we drifted over the Oconee River our Captain began looking for a place to set down.
David said that there was a lot of forest ahead and we needed to find some "wiggle room" to avoid drifting over the woods and having to go a long long way. We could see our chase team following us and David decided it was best to try to set down on the side of the road. That was kind of scary because there were electric wires running on the opposite side of the road! I realized we didn't have any brakes, and stopping was totally at the skill of the pilot! Wiggle room??? We went lower and lower and I thought surely we were going to hit the trees., which we did!
The bottom of the basket scraped the trees and helped us go slower. We set down right by the road and it was amazing! The cars coming and going stopped and watched as we set down and then climbed out. The process of deflating and packing the balloon was quite a chore, but it was a great feeling! I enjoyed it a lot! It was a real feeling of adventure, and I was proud that I could have the courage to ride the wind!
Tuesday, February 18, 2014
Decisions, decisions, decisions!
If I were to go to my Mom's I would drive by myself and I am a little worried about this. It tires me to do it when I am well. I could go part of the way and stop for the night. I worry about being alone on the road at times, although I am very cautious and observant when I am alone. I also don't want to show up at my Mom's with a funny looking face and I am sure people will not feel all that comfortable. I will wait until in the morning and see. My right eye is swollen and looks like I got hit without the black and blue part. I want to be in Florida and I feel stuck.
I didn't take the shingles vaccine because I thought if you had shingles once you couldn't get it again. I had a mild case of it some years ago. I definitely know this is wrong, so if you are a candidate for the vaccine go get it! I just feel a little scared. Don't know why. Sometimes being alone, living alone is very easy, and sometimes I feel very small and wished I had someone to take care of me. Someone I could hide behind and know that they had my back. I do have friends who do a darned good job of this when they can, as they can. Thank God for that!!!!
Sunday, February 16, 2014
Shingles
Monday, February 10, 2014
Getting adjusted to not working full time.
I can truly say they are like my family and I think there was a fear that my retirement would end our friendship. I knew that there wasn't any chance of that, and it has been reassuring that our time together is just as precious as ever. I actually did accomplish several things. I washed a load of wash, I defrosted some frozen food and had a really good supper. I walked my dogs. I visited with three of my neighbors. I completely emptied a box of reciepts and documents for 2013, getting ready for taxes. I took care of several phone calls and kept an eye on the news and especially the weather. there is a winter storm watch for this area and a strong likelihood of winter weather, snow and ice in Northern Georgia. I really wanted to go and watch the snow fall and accumulate, but the forecast is for ice and I know how dangerous this is. I did the wise thing and decided to stay home, but I sort of felt that was a mistake. That somehow I was betraying my Seize the Day philosophy and becoming a grown up. Who wants to be a grown up? That is really depressing.
I also spent time with a program http://www.bitstrips.com that enables you to make cartoons and learned some of the operation of that. It was a bit complicated and I wish I could learn more . I don't think it is that hard, if you know what you are doing. I believe people need to try things. How do you know you have a talent if you don't allow yourself to experience it? That is one of the reasons I think something like Girl and Boy Scouts are such a good thing for kids to be involved in. Earning badges prompts scouts to try many different skills and learn a variety of new things that enlarge a young persons experience base. I have thought about being a scout leader, but I would see that as a big commitment. I might head that way before it is over.